A while back, dating used to consist of first dates that ended with marriage proposals, or families making marriage deals between their children. But in the past three decades, dating has become more of a process that can last for years before marriage is even considered.
As generations change, so does the idea of dating and how one finds a companion. When the first modern newspaper was invented, people bought personal ads to discreetly connect and communicate with one another in hopes of finding love or sex. But, when the Internet was conceived, it connected us all, thus personal ads went digital and the Internet dating service was born.
The internet has changed many things and nowhere has it had a larger impact than with the dating industry. Online dating websites started to bring a younger audience to the dating and singles matchmaking industry, where these systems would conveniently email you people in your area who were also looking to meet other single people.
The fact that these early sites, as many poor quality sites still do today, would simply collect as many photographs as possible and send them to you, would frequently result in you opening your email only to have a photo staring out at you that could scare a police horse.
The better quality online dating sites have highly developed searches and tools such as “connect phrases” to help you find the right person. There is good evidence that the sites that charge for membership have a much higher quality of contact, with the more you pay the more serious the member.
Free sites or sites that charge a nominal amount tend to attract the “one night stand” end of the market and tend to have page after page of contacts that you have to trawl through with little or no information about that person, apart from the fact they like holidays, nice people and watching the X factor, with dislikes of people who bring an axe on the first date!
The future of online dating, whether you are looking for the chance to meet a long term partner, or maybe looking for something more casual, does seem to be assured, as the high divorce rate and number of people staying single looks set to continue globally in the years to come.
However, things are about to change in the future of online dating, just as dating changed with the advent of the internet. Only this time it may be even more of a revolution, as computers get faster along with Internet connection speeds.
These advances will bring more exciting ways to date and meet people as social networking sites have recently shown. As computer graphics improve, we will see Virtual reality start to become the norm in online dating.
Some websites have been developing technologies in this area ready to take advantage of faster computing power and are preparing to launch these new services in the near future.
10 Simple Rules for Online Dating Success
Online dating websites are becoming more popular each day with millions of members throughout the world seeking that special friendship or relationship.
Yet there still remains a large percentage of users who become disillusioned with poor results, high monthly fees and attention from the wrong type of fellow members.
In theory, online dating is the ideal way to meet your ‘perfect match’, yet a surprisingly small percentage of members are actually successful in finding what they seek online. There are, however, some simple guidelines, which if implemented, will greatly increase your chances of success in the online dating arena.
- Firstly, it is important that you choose the ideal dating website to suit your particular interest. There are now many niche areas in online dating. You should use the search engines to find a selection of dating websites where you consider you are most likely to find your ideal date.
- Once you have located websites in the niche area of online dating that suit you most, always visit a handful of them and look for the administrator contact link. Send an email to the admin of each website, asking how many full paying members they have in their database. A well administered dating website should reply to your email within a couple of hours. Admin is all important, and will be 24/7 on a quality dating site.
- Never join a free dating website if you are serious about finding a mate. ‘Free For All’ sites are often littered with incomplete profiles, and not taken seriously by their membership. A free trial period is good, but before making your choice of website to join, check out the member facilities. Do they have a chat room, video chat, a forum, instant messenger etc? Be wary of dating sites that do not allow you to search members before joining.
- One last thing before you decide on your ideal dating site. Many dating sites are being infiltrated by scammers often from Africa, Ghana, Nigeria or Singapore. The IP addresses from these areas can be blocked by dating sites to save genuine members from being hassled. A good dating site will use these blocking tactics, and it’s worth asking the question.
- Once you make your choice and register with a dating website, you need to create a profile. Keep to the truth, but make yourself come across as interesting as possible, and be reasonably accurate in describing the type of partner you seek. Including a photograph will certainly increase your chances of being noticed.
- When sending emails to other members, always be polite and courteous, especially in the first contact email. First impressions are very important. Always reply to every email you receive from other members, even if it’s only to inform them that you are not interested.
- Never give out your bank account or social security details to anyone. Do not be fooled by requests for money from people you just met no matter how convincing their story is or how beautiful or handsome their photos appear. Be aware that the photos are almost certainly not really them at all but merely photos of models copied from the Internet. The moment you are asked for money, cease all conversations with that member and report the scam to the administrators.
- Once you open up contact with a member who you think may interest you, take your time in getting to know them well. You now have the opportunity to exchange relevant details about each other, and exchange photographs. However, in the early communications, don’t believe all you are told. Trust will come in time.
- Photographs often display the date on which they were taken, but be aware that some members will use old photographs in an effort to make themselves appear younger than they actually are. If your dating site has video cam facilities, you can get to see each other in real time which is useful in determining your prospective mate’s current appearance.
- If you do decide to meet another member for real, always suggest meeting in a busy area, and keep the first meeting short. Chemistry is something you just cannot measure through the Internet. It wouldn’t be much fun spending a weekend with someone who you shared no chemistry with.
So these are just a few simple but important guidelines which hopefully will make your online dating experience a pleasant one. Remember that they are only guidelines and not rules. Everyone is different and you will need to explore together in order to discover the higher ground.
6 Tips For Safe Online Dating
There is no doubt that online dating can put you in touch with some great people and you may just end up finding your Prince Charming or Dream Girl as the case may be. However, online dating is not without its risks.
This is why I have put together these online dating safety tips which will help you to have a fun experience, while keeping yourself out of harms way.
- Your safety lesson in online dating starts from your profile itself. Make sure not to reveal exact personal details (real name, telephone numbers, street addresses etc) in your profile for everyone to see. For the first few weeks you should communicate with other daters only through the message system that is available on the sites.
This personal messaging system keeps your name and contact details anonymous so that you can get to know the other person without revealing your true identity.
Once you feel you know someone well enough, you can then disclose your personal details and also set up a date. And in case you do end up communicating with someone who turns out to be a creep (they are unfortunately unavoidable), your real identity will be protected.
Once you do set up a date with an online friend, always ensure that you do not ask them to come over to your home on the first date itself. No, you should not even have them pick you up at home. Instead, arrange to meet up at the designated spot.
- If you have a friend who is also into online dating, you could get together with your friend and have a double date. This way, you won’t be alone when you meet your online friend, and you will also have someone to get away with in case your date turns out to be a bore!
- Never ever agree to have your first date in a private or secluded spot. You may think that this is very basic advice, but you’ll be amazed (perhaps shocked may be a better word!) to know that countless people still make this mistake and end up in prospectively dangerous situations. You should pick an open and public place for your date; say a restaurant, the park, etc. If you do decide to go to another place with your date, do not get into the car with them. Take your own vehicle or call and ask a friend to take you there. Yes, all this may seem like too much trouble, but better to be safe than sorry!
- Avoid drinking alcohol on your first date. If you must, make sure you have just a couple of drinks and no more. Ask the waiter or the bar tender to serve you. If you have left the drink for any reason, perhaps to visit the rest room, do not have the same drink when you do return.
- Before you leave for your date, make sure a friend or relative knows where you are going and when to expect you back. If something untoward does happen, you at least know that someone will be out looking for you.
Thus, by keeping these online dating safety tips in mind, you can rest easy that you are doing all you can to protect yourself. And with that worry off your mind, you are free to go out and have a whale of a time with your new online date!
9 Stupid Mistakes to Avoid While Dating Online – For Guys
Internet online dating takes patience and practice. Just because you are seated at your own computer doesn’t mean that people will come to chat with you for no reason. Even in this medium of Internet dating, you must take the initiative and actively seek to contact those you like.
But even if you contact some people or they contact you, there are some incredibly stupid things guys are doing on Internet dating and singles sites that make most if not all women ignore them.
Women are searching men who know how to make them feel good and can have a great time with. They are looking for someone intelligent, someone who listens, a man with a good sense of humor, a well-rounded person with a positive attitude.
If you want to get some responses and even get to know closely women by online dating you have to stop doing the mistakes that are chasing all the women away. So:
- Women browse profiles to find their match just like you do. Post a good recent picture of yourself, a nice picture that shows your sense of humor or style. Do not send women pictures of your “privates”. They will ask if they want to see that.
- Make sure your profile contains proper spelling and grammar. Women like an intelligent person. Do not ruin your chances with simple mistakes in your profile. Take some time to get it right guys and you will get a response.
- Women usually like men with some class, so don’t choose a nickname that has a sexual innuendo (unless you are on an adult dating site). You don’t want to give the impression that you’re just searching for a one night stand.
- Don’t use negative words in your profile. Women are much more likely to be attracted to a positive person.
- Send individual emails and put some thought into contacting women on these dating sites. Women get 100 emails a day from all sorts of guys. If you copy and paste 10 exactly same emails and send them off you just go over-looked.
- Show women that you are a caring person. Get to know the woman. Ask questions to learn about who she is, what she does, etc. Don’t talk only about yourself.
- Do not pretend that you are willing to fly half way round the world to meet someone you have been chatting to when using online dating sites if you are not really serious. It’s not fair for anyone including you. It’s easy to get carried away with a lovely person seven thousand miles away, but are you really going to get out of that chair and go and meet them? If you are, you have our utmost support and respect. If you are really only looking for someone in your state or close to home then stick with that and make it clear.
- If you are married don’t lie, tell from the very beginning. Women can feel this and it gets you nowhere. If you are sincere maybe you will find someone who is willing to spend some good time with you.
- If a woman tells you that she is not interested in you do not keep sending her messages. You are losing your time and she can complain that you are harassing her.
Be patient, it takes time to find someone special when using online dating sites and dating services, like anywhere else for that matter. Keep in mind that Internet online dating takes patience and practice. Just because you are seated at your own computer doesn’t mean that people will come to chat with you for no reason. Even in this medium of Internet dating, you must take the initiative and actively seek to contact those you like.